Hurley & Me Chapter 1

- Please Read "Hurley & Me Intro" first for a little background (just click on the first link under my March posts)

Ch. 1
Without delving into the past so much, let's begin with Thursday, March 18th. Operation: single mom.

Jason is now flying over the ocean to aaaahh freakin' Africa! Are you kidding me? So awesome. With all that excitement, the worry does set in and with more than just myself to care for, I am channeling my inner pioneer chick. God quickly reminded me of how blessed I am that Jason is not a traveling salesman or in the military. Huge props to you military wives. He will be gone for only 15 days and I know that there are those who don't see their husbands for 15 months or more and they are putting their lives in danger for our freedom. I salute you.

So Hurley knows when his daddy is gone. I have to admit he is a bit more slouchy and a little lost. So I'll cut to the chase and present the main problem. Hurley is an escape artist. We live on property but it would take extreme measures and cost to fence enough of it to make him happy. We did fence a small area in the back attached to a covered "dog run", but he has turned his nose up at that. I let him out there and he will stand at the glass door and bark at me in disapproval with his snout fogging up the glass and a stream of drool hanging from at least one side of his mouth. (I go through a lot of paper towels). What he wants is to go free. I've learned a few things about labs and one is that they like to go #2 in private, up in the trees or across the road on the neighbors property (heehee) so that is definitely a positive trait. You can imagine what the size and odor of such matter would entail cleaning up either before or after it's "too late". One time when he was younger I ran over some and the entire car smelled like it for miles cause it kicked up into the engine or something.

So now he does okay with being set "free" first thing in the morning to do his business and I can always count on him returning to the door for his breakfast. So that's all good. Gotta let a dog be a dog or what's the point right? Now I'm just a trusting person who wants to believe the best in everyone. Hurley will hang around if we are outside with him, throwing the frisbee or the ball but oh no, even if he's worn out and panting on the front step and I just run inside to grab a phone call or take Lily to the potty, 9 times out of 10 I'm standing there telling Lily " oh man, Hurley ran away again". We yell for him "Hurley, come get treats!!!". "Treats" is the magic word if you are lucky enough to catch him within earshot but sometimes that doesn't even work. He will look at me, smirk, and bolt down the hill, into the woods and out of sight. Maybe smirk isn't exactly accurate but that's what it feels like to my status as pack leader.

When he first discovered the dogs down the road, his new gang, his home-dogs, it was definitely scary for us because we didn't know where he was going or if he'd be hit by a car or dog-napped by someone that recognized his fabulous looks and stature. I must admit he is a beautiful dog. When he sits down and looks at you it is like a Norman Rockwell painting in the form of a statue. Quite handsome. So after we figured out he was going to the same place every time we could relax a little. This neighbor actually lives about 1/2 mile away as the crow flies (I really do sound like an Oregonian don't I?) anyway, it's not like she lives 2 houses down the street. It's a jaunt. She has 4 dogs, his BFF's, and being a dog lover, she gives him treats that probably taste like bacon as opposed to my dry, tasteless milk bones. Whatever! Apparently life rocks over there.

So after this happened about 5 times, we figured it was because he wasn't neutered yet and that might help to solve the problem. 100 bucks later and 2 less for him, nope. No such luck. Hurley still felt it acceptable to visit his friends whenever he pleased. Now, on top of keeping track of 2 kids (Lily is almost 3 and Levi is 9 months) there's 100 pound Birdie. Who reading this owns a lab? If you do you know that if kept indoors they are followers. I go to the kitchen, Hurley gets up and goes to the kitchen. I'm making eggs at the stove, he is laying under the stove. I walk down the hall to use the restroom, Hurley walks down the hall and tries to spy on me. Out!! I say. He obeys and then lays by the door so when I open it I have to step over him. Seriously???!!! I'm totally laughing right now because while so annoying it's so funny. Maybe tolerable if he was the only dependent in the household. I just can't be trippin' over dogs and saying excuse me to an animal when I'm trying to carry a kid around. God bless you Hurley. I'm just sayin'.

So fast forward again now to Thursday. He had escaped early afternoon and fortuntately the neighbor brought him home on her way to town as she does from time to time and to my sincere appreciation and humiliation. This time he was in the hatchback and tried to jump out before she'd opened the window to it and thudded his head. Doofus. "So, he stinks" she says while driving away. "He jumped in my koi pond". Great. Really? How bad could it be?
I had somewhere to be so Hurley went inside.
Upon my return and opening the door to our house I will try to explain the smell I was so enthralled to take in. Kinda like stagnant water, mixed with algae and fish and bad dog gas. It was late, kids needed to go to bed. I know, I thought to myself, I'll just get him in the shower with me. No worries. After kids were nestled down, I started the shower. Takes a few minutes to warm up. We have a huge shower and it has a sprayer thing so we could both easily fit in there. My plan was to kill two birds with one stone.
I was in my shower attire and called Hurley, attempting to coax him in with a treat. He just stared at me with that uh-uh no way look on his face and didn't move. So I approached him and got him at least into the bathroom and shut the door. Then with all my womanly might tried to push him into the shower. Fail. Then I straddled him and tried to push/pull him. Fail. Then I tried to pick him up under his armpits. 3 strikes. The dang dog is sooooo strong! Exhausted, I gave up and let him go, using the sprayer to hose off all the hair now covering me. Ridiculous and thankfully not on video.